Here's the Kewl Kwotes master list:

  • "Your best thinking and decisions got you to your first meeting of AA."
  • "If you share your pain you cut it in half, if you don't you double it."
  • "By the inch it is a sinch and by the yard its hard."
  • "There's no elevator, you have to take the steps."
  • "aa is not for people who need it, it's for people who want it."
  • "Part of compliance is defiance, but you must arrive at acceptance of the disease."
  • "I'm an egomaniac with an inferiority complex."
  • "My head is like a bad neighborhood and I shouldn't go in there alone."
  • "Religion is for people who are afraid they'll go to hell. Spirituality is for people who have been there."
  • "I'm not going to give anybody free rent in my head."
  • "I was hopelessly dopeful...now I'm dopelessly hopeful."
  • "I used to be a hopeless dope fiend, now I'm a dopeless hope fiend."
  • "I need to put things in perspective because I have a disease of perception."
  • "an alcoholic is chosen to find God."
  • "The quality of your recovery is proportional to the quality of your surrender."
  • "I'm a W.C.S. person. That's Worst Case Scenario."
  • "I'm basically a negative person, that's why I'm so happy."
  • "Untreated alcoholism without the steps on a daily basis will make my past my future."
  • "Uncover...Discover...Discard."
  • "Those who relapse are attending powerlessness graduate school."
  • "This program changes the way I relate to me. That's what I'm trying to do, change the way I relate to me."
  • "If you commit suicide you're killing the wrong person."
  • "If you're not moving away from a drink you're moving closer to it."
  • "I've been beating up on myself so much I feel like hitting myself."
  • "a critic is a person who goes onto the battlefield after the battle has been fought and shoots the survivors."
  • "aa is not a program to get sober...it's a program to live your life successfully and to be happy once you get sober."
  • "I'd never trade my worst day sober for my best day drunk."
  • "being an alcoholic does not give me the excuse to act alcoholically."
  • "I worked my using hard, so now I want to work my sobriety hard."
  • "The shortest sentence in the big book is, "It Works."
  • "The power behind me is greater than the problem in front of me."
  • "When you're in fear you're not in faith."
  • "a fear faced is a fear erased."
  • "Every time I draw a sober breath I'm like a fish out of water."
  • "I was a scream in search of a mouth."
  • "I didn't make it all the way to the beach to drown in the sand."
  • "Drinking gave me the illusion that I might be alive." (Chekhov, Uncle Vanya)
  • "I am one drink away from never being sober again for the rest of my life."
  • "Praying is asking God for help, meditating is listening for God's answer."
  • "The reason I'm here is because I'm not all there."
  • "Put your chip under your tongue and if it dissolves you can take another drink."
  • "My biggest problem was bottles of the two-legged variety."
  • "My basic problem is that I flee from those who want me and I pursue the rejectors."
  • "When I live in the past, I live in regret. When I live in the future, I live in fear. When I stay in the NOW, everything's always okay." (from Joan T.)
  • "If I could drink socially I'd get drunk every night."
  • "There's no speeding in the trudging zone."
  • "having a resentment is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to die."
  • "Courage is fear in action."
  • "had the eyes no tears, the soul would have no rainbow." (from Teresa)
  • "God will heal your broken heart, if you will give him all the pieces." (from Teresa)
  • "My life hereafter is from this moment on."
  • "We are attracted to people who share in our growth and progress and lose interest in those who don't."
  • "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear." (ambrose Redmoon)
  • "Self will imprisoned me far more than bars ever did."
  • "I've definitely got the "ism" in alcoholism...that's incredibly short memory."
  • "I had to learn how to float in this program because I'm a sinker."
  • On relapse: "I never did anything in moderation...except maybe the steps."
  • "bring the body and the mind follows."
  • "It's not the load that breaks you down...it's the way you carry it."
  • "When you choose the lesser of two evils, always remember that it is still an evil." (Max Lerner)
  • "If everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane."
  • "Go often to the house of thy friend, for weeds choke the unused path."
  • (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
  • "Life is not so much a matter of position as of disposition."
  • "Seven days without a meeting makes one weak." (from herb b.)
  • Regarding hanging out at bars: "If you hang out at the barbershop long enough you're bound to get a haircut." (from bill G.)
  • On relapse: "I never did anything in moderation...especially the steps."
  • "bring the body and the mind follows."
  • "Tomorrow's a fantasy and yesterday's gone...there's only today."
  • "Thank you, God, for the beautiful day I'm going to have if I can just get rid of my fucking attitude."
  • "We're sick people trying to get better, not bad people trying to be good."
  • "When you've got one foot in yesterday and the other in tomorrow, you can only piss on today." (from Steve and anjanette)
  • "The only way to have gratitude is to live in the now, not in the past or the future."
  • "I didn't get my life back in this program...I got my life for the first time."
  • "I never had a problem that was worse than the old solution I found for it."
  • "What other people think of you is none of your business."
  • "If it wasn't for denial my life would be shit."
  • "Change only happens when the pain of holding on is greater than the fear of letting go."
  • "an expectation is a premeditated resentment."
  • "I used to shoot up and throw up, now I suit up and show up." (David F.)
  • "If you can't love everybody today, at least try not to hurt anybody."
  • "The reasonable person adapts to society. an unreasonable person adapts society." (Terry M.)
  • "Give us the fortitude to endure the things which cannot be changed, and the courage to change the things which should be changed, and the wisdom to know one from the other." (Oliver J. hart)
  • "If it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter."
  • "Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great." (Mark Twain)
  • "My sobriety depends on who God is, not who I am." (Duane M.)
  • "You cannot save your ass and your face at the same time." (Dennis K.)
  • "Cash register honesty is easier than being honest with yourself, because at least you know the rules." (Ginger)
  • "acceptance without gratitude is bullshit."
  • "You're not responsible for your disease, but you are responsible for your behavior."
  • "If you don't want what we have, we will cheerfully refund your misery."
  • "have a nice day unless you've made other plans."
  • "If you refuse to accept anything but the best you very often get it."
  • "Now that I'm sober I hit my knees in a different way than I used to." (Jay)
  • "Work to become, not to acquire." (Elbert hubbard)
  • Regarding believing in God: "Pretend. act as if. Fake it until you make it."
  • "Don't be afraid to take a big step. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps." (David Lloyd George)
  • On the hopelessness of addiction from somebody who is still using: "I used to think there was light at the end of the tunnel, but for me today the light is on a locomotive headed right for me."
  • The value of the average conversation could be enormously improved by the constant use of four simple words: "I do not know." (andre Maurois)
  • "Living our pre-aa active daily lifestyle was akin to switching seats on the Titanic."
  • "You can't direct the wind, but you can adjust your sails."
  • "Yes, you can be a dreamer and a doer too, if you will remove one word from your vocabulary: impossible." (Robert Schuller)
  • "If triangles had a God, he would have 3 sides." (Montesquieu)
  • "Everyone is kneaded out of the same dough but not baked in the same oven." (Yiddish proverb)
  • "Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time." (Robert Schuller)
  • "Real generosity toward the future lies in giving all to the present." (albert Camus)
  • "behaviorism is the art of pulling habits out of rats." (O'Neill)
  • "The greatest good you can do for another is not just share your riches, but reveal to them their own." (Disraeli)
  • "The worst of all deceptions is self-deception." (Plato)
  • "Whenever you fall, pick something up." (Oswald avery)
  • "If you continually give you will continually have."
  • "he then learns that in going down into the secrets of his own mind he has descended into the secrets of all minds." (Emerson)
  • "It is easier to get forgiveness than permission." (Cecile Stewart)
  • "Fear knocked on my door...I opened it and there was nobody there."
  • "be careful what you pray for, you just might get it."
  • The most important word in the Steps is the first one... "WE"
  • "The world ain't gonna kiss my butt just because I'm getting sober."
  • "My mind is out to get me."
  • "a recovering alcoholic without a sponsor is much like leaving Dracula in charge of the blood bank."
  • "Relapse starts long before the drink is drunk."
  • "First the man takes a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes the man."
  • The secret to long term sobriety: Don't drink, don't die.
  • "If from the skies fall lemons, make lemonade." (Gabriel G.)
  • "Don't let the limits of your imagination block you from what God can do for you." (Suzanne)
  • "angels fly because they take themselves so lightly."
  • "I have a very high pain threshold and a very low fear threshold."
  • "I always look for the hardest way to do the easiest thing." (Jay M.)
  • "If you don't grow, you go."
  • "If you don't hear what you need to hear, say what you need to hear."
  • "we shall not cease from exploration and the end of all our exploring Will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time..." (T.S. Elliot)
  • "Look at everything as though you were seeing it either for the first or last time. Then your time on earth will be filled with glory." (betty Smith)
  • "Nothing contributes more to peace of soul than having no opinion at all."  
    (George Christopher Lichtenberg)
  • "We could never learn to be brave and patient, if there were only joy in the world." (helen Keller)
  • "Fear is a darkroom for developing negatives."
  • "I would rather be able to appreciate things I can not have than to have things I am not able to appreciate." (Elbert hubbard)
  • "a smooth sea never made a skillful sailor."
  • "When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last." (Griffin's Thought)
  • "While I'm in a meeting, my disease is out in the parking lot doing push-ups." (Mike M.)
  • "When I moved in sobriety, I went to the meetings and thought,'Oh, you do things differently here...i.e., wrong.'" (Mike M.)
  • "Laziness is no more than the habit of resting before you get tired." (Jules Renard)
  • "Democracy is where you can say what you think even if you don't think."
  • "It is not length of life, but depth of life." (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
  • Two step formula for handling stress: 1. Don't sweat the small stuff. 2. Remember that it's all small stuff. (anthony Robbins)
  • "The world is made for people who aren't cursed with self-awareness." (the
  • character annie Savoy in the film bull Durham)
  • "Listen or thy tongue will keep thee deaf." (american Indian Proverb)
  • "When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to resemble a nail." (abraham Maslow)
  • Deja Fu: The feeling that somehow, somewhere, you've been kicked in the head like this before.
  • "a day without sunshine is like night."
  • "he who dies with the most toys, is, nonetheless, still dead."
  • ON HUMILITY: "To err is human, to moo bovine."
  • ON PROPhECY: "The meek shall inherit the earth -- they are too weak to refuse."
  • "People that don't go to meetings, don't hear about what happens to people that don't go to meetings." (Phil a.)
  • "You can't think your way into right living...you have to live your way into right thinking." (Pat h.)
  • "If you're not enjoying this program, maybe you're not working it right." (Pat h.)
  • "If you find working the steps too hard, try living them instead...that's where the real joy in the program lies." (Pat H.)
  • "If you wanna make God laugh, tell him YOUR plans for the day." (Bob B.)
  • "United we stand; divided we stagger."
  • "Complete possession is proved only by giving. all you are unable to give possesses you." (andre Gide)
  • "If you truly want to understand something, try to change it. " (Kurt Lewin)
  • "he who foresees calamities suffers them twice over."
  • "he who no's himself is wise. he who knows himself is enlightened."
  • "Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm." (Winston Churchill)
  • "There is an easy answer to your problem that is neat, plausible, and wrong."
  • "a designer knows he has achieved perfection not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away." (antoine de Saint-Exup'ery)
  • "Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation."
  • "Nervousness is just God trying to shake the truth out of you."
  • "belief without action is the ruin of the soul." (Edward abbey)
  • "he who knows that enough is enough will always have enough."
  • "I have often regretted my speech, never my silence."
  • "Our defects of character are the bars of a cage. The central point is not to study the bars, but to get out of the cage."
  • "Recovery is a journey between two stations. One station represents total chaos, and the other represents total serenity. What is important is not where you are, but what direction you are facing."
  • Life without recovery: Even roses have thorns. Life in recovery: Even thorns have roses.
  • "If you do not know where you are going, then any road will take you there."(David L.)
  • "The slogans work much better for me when I decorate my life with them rather than decorating the walls with them." (Jenn K.)
  • "The most natural state of an alcoholic is irritable, restless, and discontented."
  • "We are human bEings, not human DOings."
  • "Recognizing someone else's human dignity cannot cost you your own."
  • "I'd rather have a frontal lobotomy than a bottle in front of me."
  • "If you don't want what we have, your misery can be refunded."
  • "Funny...I ruined my health by drinking to other's!"
  • "Don't Entertain The Thought."
  • "Progress Not Perfection."
  • "The chains of alcohol are too light to be felt until they are too strong to be broken."
  • "I didn't get into trouble every time I drank, but every time I got into trouble I was drinking.
  • "happiness is not a place you arrive at, it is a way you travel."
  • "The only real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes." (Marcel Proust)
  • "Is it not better to aim your spear at the moon and strike only an eagle, than to aim your spear at the eagle, and strike only a rock?"
  • "If your ass falls off, put it in a paper bag and take it to a meeting."
  • "If my brain didn't need me for transportation, it would have killed me a long time ago!"
  • "If you're not a lion tamer, don't go into the lion's den."
  • "You can't speed up your recovery, but you sure can slow it down."
  • "If I don't let go, I lose my grip."
  • "If God is your co-pilot, SWITCH SEATS!"
  • "It's 11:00, do you know where your brain is?"
  • "Talk does not cook rice."
  • New York Steps 1, 2, and 3: "I can't, he can, so let him!"
  • "If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got."
  • "We'll love you until you learn to love yourself."
  • "Don't give up before the miracle happens."
  • "Unless I accept my virtues, I will be overwhelmed with my faults."
  • "Pray daily, God is easier to talk to than most people."
  • "Willpower tells me I must, but willingness tells me I can."
  • "Emotions aren't facts."
  • "Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less."
  • "If GOD drives you out, BOOZE will bring you back."
  • "You can't think your way into a new way of living...you have to live your way into a new way of thinking!"
  • "No God, no peace...Know God, know peace."
  • "It's not the yets we have to worry about, it's the again's."
  • "Rejection is God's protection."
  • INTIMACY = In-to-me-I-see
  • "ME + U is a power greater than ME. U + US is a power greater than U."
  • "Winners do what they have to do and losers do what they want to do."


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